This isn’t one of those posts I write with advice embedded into it and this isn’t even going to be a post with much of a beginning, middle and an end.
Nope, this is a post that I am writing on my iPhone while I soak in a glorious, peaceful bubble bath.
I was talking to a client and very dear friend of mine today about business and life and how the two end up affecting each other so much. In my case, my daughter is cutting her first year molars and it’s killing me… Figuratively speaking of course but the late nights, endless suffering she is experiencing and my insane work schedule has created this space where I feel slightly trapped.
You see, business is not an easy journey to choose. Over the past seven years, I have not gone a day (literally not a day – probably not even an hour) where someone has not needed me for something. If you are in business too, you might be able to relate. Regardless of how many hours you put in, regardless of how much support you have around you, someone ALWAYS needs you.
I am fairly certain that this is why I started my business in the first place. I loved feeling needed and like I was making a difference and more importantly, I loved when my clients relied on me to make their life easier. I had a place in the universe – a purpose. However, sometimes I wish that I had a day, or an hour, where I could disappear and not be needed.
You see, with being needed comes a lot of guilt. Guilt when you can’t produce the way you want to, perform the way you want to and be the kind of person you want to be for everyone you know. The guilt then turns into resentment and that isn’t healthy for anyone.
So, I’ve been learning. I’ve been learning that it’s okay to be imperfect, it’s okay to say no to things, it’s okay to choose what or who I give my time to.
I was talking to Steve tonight about our daughter and I was telling him that I want to make her growing up experience memorable and exciting. I don’t want to focus on material things or keeping a perfect house or having her in the best schools (not that I don’t think education is important but I do believe it should be chosen based on the individual needs of the child and not because of the school’s status in the community). I kind of feel that way about my business too. It’s more important to me to get my offerings / talent / skills / whatever out to the world than it is to worry that everything has to be perfect.
I’m also learning that when you balance life and a business so delicately on your shoulders, something somewhere has to give a little and that is okay too.
What are your big learning lessons about business as you make your way through?