Sometimes I hit moments in my entrepreneur life (ten years next year!) where I’m just over it.
Over the grind and the hustle.
Over the expectations and everyone needing something all the time.
Over trying to figure out what the next right step is.
Over the pressure to succeed and the fear of failing.
Over the recurring, romantic rendezvous that I have with the fantastical idea of getting a “real” job where I can quit what I do at 5pm and check out like the rest of the world.
Over biting my tongue and shielding what I really want to say for fear that it will reflect negatively on my business.
Over playing it safe. Feeling fear. Being afraid of what other people think.
On those days, it can be crippling to bring myself to my keyboard.
The idea of staying in bed and catching up on Mad Men, while drowning my sorrows with a delicious Brie and a glass of wine, sounds like the only possibility. Compulsively perusing job boards to see what exists in the real world becomes my reality. The feeling of agitation and unhappiness bumps up against the other facets of my life.
It makes me second guess and question everything.
It makes me want to run and hide.
It makes me want to scream at myself for not choosing a simpler path.
A simpler path…
Entrepreneurship is hard.
It pushes you up against your belief systems all the time.
It forces you to interact and engage with more people than you may be used to or may want to.
It forces you to push the boundaries of your creativity and your stamina and your drive.
You dig deep and you pull.
Pulling on the invisible force that drives the business forward… forward… forward. Ever-moving forward.
But it’s enlightening. And inspiring. And beautiful.
When I’m feeling “over it” as an entrepreneur, I pull away. I pull back from the grind and the hustle and the expectations and the everyone needing something all the time and I reflect inward. I meditate. I do yoga. I pull out my copy of The Desire Map (namaste Danielle Laporte, namaste) and I write. A lot.
I write down the things that I love about the business and the character traits that I need to create the business I so desire. When I am reminded of what makes it all possible to achieve what I want to achieve, I can re-focus in on why I started it. Why I wake up and do what I do. Why I can’t picture myself doing anything else.
And I create a declaration to the Universe.
Universe, my business has been gifted to me from some innate characteristic that I was born with. It was birthed from pure passion and is nurtured through my desire to create things that I can share with other people. Don’t let me lose sight of that. Stoke the fire every day with new creative moments and sparks of inspiration. Let me know when I’m hot and when I’m cold. Navigate me through the waters so that I may land ashore to do what I was born and created to do.
And when I do that… when I truly get in touch with why I do what I do, even amidst the bullshit and the hardships, I remember. It floods back in and I’m rejuvenated and revived and alive again.
What do you do when you feel “over it”? How do you reconnect with yourself and your business when you feel like you’re a capsizing boat in the middle of an ocean? Lemme know in the comments below.
Photo credit to http://www.flickr.com/photos/carbonnyc/